Posts tagged dictionary
Needless to say

House bile is an occasional feature explaining a) what to do, (2) what not to do and iii. why that convention you've been following is dumb. This time, we look at the expression needless to say.

If something needs to be said, say it. Don’t tell me it doesn’t need to be said. It’s confusing and unnecessary. Seriously, just what are you trying to do here? Sneak some crucial, always-read-the-small-print detail past without my noticing?

Hm. No. That’s not it. You’re making fun. You’re trying to patronise me in some way I haven’t yet figured out. You want me to know that something is obvious that it doesn’t need to be pointed out, except to me.

Yeah, that’s it! You’ve figured out that when I see ‘needless to say’, I deduce ‘needless to read’. Then I skip ahead a couple of percentage points on the progress bar; I’ve got a Grisham lined up next. He’s turning out two a year these days – more than double my reading rate since I reactivated Netflix for Can’t Pay? We’ll Take it Away.

Kafkaesque

House bile is an occasional feature explaining a) what to do, (2) what not to do and iii. why that convention you've been following is dumb. This time, we look at the term Kafkaesque.

Unless you're describing actually turning into a dung beetle or literally never finishing a novel, you are using this incorrectly. Your struggles at the DMV, issues downloading the correct assembly instructions for the IKEA Trysil wardrobe or bafflement at the range of available cat litters are merely Kafka-ish, and you should adjust yourself accordingly.

See also: Orwellian. Very few things in your life are similar to anything you can find in the works of Eric Arthur Blair. However, if you've ever found yourself despondently pumping lead into the hide of a deranged Indian elephant, under the cosh of a porcine overclass or trying to get laid without having your face eaten by rats, you get a pass. Otherwise, prefer Orwellular.